About De Goede Huisvader
The photo you see as an introduction conflict with the information on this part of the website. Well, in a way it does. The photo shows some shenanigans going on in the house I live, together with my family. The message I want to bring forward is all about me and the importance of changing patterns or roles in life.
First, let’s start with the question to the answer. I am Harm Jagerman. I was born in the seventies in the beautiful city Leiden (The Netherlands). I will not bother you with all the ins-and-outs of my education. It leads me to take an IT job at the end of the previous century. From there on, I went to different paths in my career. I worked as a recruiter, as a consultant and finally as an application manager. That was when I was employed.
In 2013 things turned around. I was already a self-employed photographer (2010). At that time, I combined my work for a major Dutch hospital with being self-employed. Also, I combined this with family life. In 2013 I suffered from a severe burn-out. I quit my job at the hospital and I was now the stay-at-home-dad. I decided to work on getting better. I did succeed and was even employed as a consultant and (later) an online marketer. In 2017, I decided it was enough. Even working part-time was very hard, because our oldest child needed more care. I became the stay-at-home-dad. I didn’t do much with my business activities. This changed when I was asked to lead a webshop project in 2018. I started a webshop from scratch and in the end, I was even running this. It wasn’t something that I was content with, because it took a lot of time. Therefore I decided to quit this job and work on my projects.
Then COVID-19 came around and my business activities became less and less. I focussed, together with my partner, on homeschooling. You can check out the photo series at the other website of De Goede Huisvader (www.goedehuisvader.nl/en).
Nowadays, I am asked more and more to create, develop and maintain websites. I still consider myself to be a photographer, writer and designer. Perhaps, I can help you with issues related to these subjects too. Find out what I can do at www.harmjagerman.nl/en.
What do I do?
It’s not all about my family life. Yes, it plays an important role. Being a stay-at-home-dad is something I can and want to tell others more about. Because I believe emancipation is important. It’s not just a matter of something that is related only to women. Changes have to be made by men, who control many things in life. Being a stay-at-home-dad is something I want the rest of the world to show. I do this via my main website. This website is here to inform you about who I am, without any distractions.
Perhaps a better question is:
What can I do?
A good and fair question to ask me is why I do this. The answer is not that simple, I think. It’s a combination of what I believe in and what I experienced. Lets’s start with my own experiences.
At the age of eleven, my father died. Being a member of the board of a nursing home he wasn’t around much. After he died, even when I was eleven years old, I decided to do things differently. That’s what I did. In the beginning, so after the birth of our first child, I arranged my working week differently. A burnout in 2013 made me think about my life. That is related to my beliefs when it comes down to emancipation.
It all comes down to equal opportunities. “We” shout that everyone deserves the same treatment. The reality is different. Men are supposed to go off to work and women stay home. Why is that so? Why can’t this be different? Because it has been done for ages? We used to burn witches and held slaves at periods in our history. We now agree that this is very wrong. Well, emancipation isn’t the same as burning witches and slavery. Or is it?
It all comes down to the role of women and those who are different in this world. These things, these issues need to be addressed. That’s why I see myself as an ambassador for the stay-at-home-dads. Or the ambassador of the possibilities. That’s why I talk about things like these!
You can still ask why I am doing this. Do I think I’m so important? It has nothing to do with that. It’s not about the attention. I want to use attention to deliver a message.
Did you know that in some cases a woman’s salary is behind that of a man (in the same position)? Did you also know that sometimes women are still asked if they plan to have children during an application process? Did you know that the preferential policy for the high (er) positions is in some cases still the same as years and years ago?
Didn’t you know this? Then it is good that I also pay attention to this. Not because I’m a man and know better. No, because I am a man who wants to see that other man make it difficult or more difficult for women. Equality is unlimited. Equality should be limitless.
These are my values. This is what I believe in. With me even more people, fortunately. For anyone who wants to know more about it, I am here to calmly explain exactly how it works. To take away the benefits. To draw attention to change. That’s what I stand for.
Equal Opportunities, Equal Rights. That’s what I believe in. Whether this has to do with women’s emancipation or the emancipation of anyone or anything. We do not have a constitution that regulates this for no reason? Why don’t we (always) stick to that ?!
What can I do?
Besides helping others in photography, copywriting, website development and digital design, I can do more. For example by talking about equal rights, emancipation or just living with a stat-at-home-dad.
What did I do?
It’s an honour to be one of the ambassadors of Emancipator. This is a Dutch organisation that is involved with the emancipation for men. Women’s emancipation isn’t possible without the men who need to change rules, patterns and many other things.
RTL Nieuws / EditieNL
After the news that the husband of Jacinda Adern (PM of New Zealand) would become a stay-at-home-dad once Ardern gave birth to her first child, I was interviewed by the Dutch news (RTL Nieuws / EditieNL).
A Dutch morning show about the way women see men and the way men really act or could act.
I also gave interviews for several Dutch magazines and newspapers.